Tuesday, December 23, 2008


Definitions are critical in the world of science. For all intents and purposes, science is an arbitrary set of rules and regulation used to standardize the world for the sake of easy communication.

As such, I like defining things. It's always so easy. For example, the definition of supercar has been having a hard go, recently. With cars like the Nissan GT-R crushing cars that cost four times as much in performance figures, and the Corvette ZR1 destroying everything ever, what is a supercar anymore?

I propose a definition that can be easily and universally applied. A supercar is a car that,

  • Costs in excess of six times the median annual income of a United States household.

  • Has 0-60mph times and top speed times in the upper 1% of production automotive performance by model volume and not production volume.

  • Is street legal with all performance numbers done on street legal tires.

  • Can seat at least two people.

I chose the six-times figure because that results in allowing the Lamborghini Murcielago onto the list, which I see as the baseline supercar. It also eliminates everything Porsche, Ferrari, and Aston Martin make. Porsche is too accessible, Aston is too soft, and Ferrari uses the Enzo as their performance baseline, meaning it's their supercar, so it's mine too.

I figure the most obvious metric for a supercar is its performance. The super-rich are classified as the upper 1%, so why not classify supercars as the upper 1%.

The street legality parameter is flexible since what constitutes street legality changes from state to state, and country to country. For example, the Porsche 959 was never certified in the United States merely because the four cars required for crash testing were never supplied by Porsche. An event such as this should not have any effect on the classification of the car. I like Top Gear's measure of a car must being able to clear a speed bump.

I chose the street legal, two-seat parameter to eliminate street-ready race cars. Race cars are very fast. Of course they are. Supercars should be fast street cars, not slow race cars.

All of the measures must be compared at the time of production. So the Porsche 959 would not be a supercar now, but it certainly was when it was produced in the late 80's.

Friday, December 19, 2008

While on the Subject...

Of homos. Or is it homoes. Either way.

The UN, in all its useful glory, recently presented a draft of a resolution calling for the legalization of homosexuality. The basic premise of the resolution is to extend human rights to people regardless of sexual orientation.

In a shocking move, the Arab states responded with their own resolution against the first resolution. The Arab resolution says the European resolution could cause "the social normalization, and possibly the legitimization, of many deplorable acts including pedophilia."

Why do people with untenable and ridiculous stances always say they are protecting children. Do they think it's a catch-all argument? How the hell do they go from legalizing being a homosexual to legalizing the rape of a child? Seriously, Arabia, go fuck yourselves.

Not like we're much better. Everybody remember Ryan White? He caught HIV from a blood transfusion. So, in a display of grand logic demonstrating humanity's superior intellect, he was banned from school, received threatening letters, phone calls, was called such accurate epithets as "faggot" and "homo," and had his house shot up from a a passing car.

If it hadn't been for an equally strong show of support from other people, I'd say that humanity should just be nuked now and let the apes take over. Arabia is not helping. Granted, Arabia doesn't help much of anything. I say we bomb 'em and take their oil. Who's with me? Oh right, we tried that. Dammit.

Only in Arkansas

I'm sure you knew what I was talking about just from the title.

The Duggar family, those human rabbits, just welcomed their 18th child into the world. A world of blind religious creed and destructive behaviors.

Michelle Duggar, the matriarch, has basically been pregnant for the last twenty years. Twenty years, eighteen children, you do the math. This is disgusting. We have a population problem, and these people feel the need to do nothing, and I mean apparently nothing but breed. To steal a line, we are not rebuilding after the flood.

We have the highly educated among us having fewer and fewer children, and yet these bottom-of-the-totem pole, borderline cro-magnons are pooping out children like they took some industrial strength ovarian laxative. I don't know what to do. Either kill them or force professors and doctors to just start breeding like mad. For pete's sake, the man's name is Jim Bob! JIM BOB! He sounds like a secondary character from the Dukes of Hazzard! His name might as well be Boomhauer!

I've argued before how I think people are foolish who do not seriously consider the philosophy of their religion, because they frequently base life actions on those beliefs. This is a fantastic example of people not doing that. And how conceivably low can the woman's self esteem be to think that the best way through life is being pregnant damn-near 24/7?

The photo above has been circulating about the interpipes for a few years, now, and is the Duggar family with fourteen children. Yep. Add FOUR MORE. The father described the most recent addition as "just absolutely beautiful, like her mom and her sisters." All of whom I sure he's having sex with.

I'm sorry to degrade to sophomoric name-calling and allegations of incest, but this is absurd. I don't consider the attack ad hominim because not only does his action deserve to be attacked, but so does he. He may not look like a hick, but fundamentalist Christians frequently don't. Instead, they look like quasi-RennFest weirdos in flower print dresses and Sunday-best suits. And not only are they fundamentalist, they are what is referred to as Quiverfull, or Full Quiver Christians.

This particular skewing of Christian creed is not only against birth control in any form, but they active try to have as many children as possible. I assume the woman basically breeds until dead. What the hell are you? Rodents?

You want to see how vacuous these people are? Check out the Wikipedia entry on the family and look at the far-reaching ambitions of the children. Or look up the teachings of the preacher they endorse, Bill Gothard. Let's look at some of his winning stances:

  • Women must submit to husbands

  • Adults must submit to the husband's father

  • He protested against Cabbage Patch Dolls and Treasure Trolls.

  • Apparently wrote The Secret, because he thinks all of life's problems come from bad character

  • That includes mental illness. I'd love to see him and Tom Cruise go at it.

  • Thinks that prayer can cure illnesses like cancer and infertility

  • Forbids dancing, dating, and exciting music as evil.

  • Thinks the "saved" should limit contact with the evil, outside world. How cult-like. Very nice.

  • All children should be home-schooled with the Bible alone.

  • Oh, and as always, homosexuality is evil and will cause the end-times.

These people are being featured in a Discovery Channel show. They're becoming something of a celebrity. They shouldn't be celebrated, even slightly! To steal another line, Michelle should have her legs tied together and be heavily sedated! They are religious fanatics who, while allowed to do this if they so want, should be mocked, derided, and ostracized. They are vapid, vacuous, ignorant, bigoted, and in all likelihood mean. I'm not just throwing names, there. People in hard-line fundamentalist groups are in those groups because of serious problems. Child abuse and spousal abuse runs rampant, and if they're not soulless shells of a human, they're very frequently petty, vindictive people scared of, and angry at the world. They should be portrayed as such.

I'm sorry, but I do not want them anywhere near me. I don't want them in our society. And, man, if they believe in avoiding contact with evil sinners like me, that is fan-freaking-tastic.

Just get the fuck off of the TV!

Friday, December 05, 2008

I Love Life, I Love Love, I Love Pie!

Much of religion is something I wouldn't want.

Hayy Ibn Yaqzan
, the eponymous star of the first Arabic novel, lived in a cave contemplating God. This was portrayed in the story as being the ideal state of a human. He hardly ever ate. He bordered on being a vegetable. I found the imagery ironically similar to Plato's allegory of the cave. Only, in this version, we spend our time in an actual cave. I assume this was intended, since much of Plato's writing was available to Ibn Tufail, the author, and he meant the irony of true illumination actually taking place in a cave. Still, just imagine what that would be like. Long beard, pale skin, emaciated from barely eating. I wouldn't want that!

I would rather be cursed to a life without a connection to God and actually get stuff done. I want to build things, write stories, and paint pictures. I would rather live a life of pain and achievement than ecstasy and inactivity. In the same way as the prospect of falling from Grace rankles me. Who wouldn't WANT to be out of the garden of Eden. I want to grow my food. I want to shepherd my animals. Who is God to say we cannot have knowledge. Our greatest asset is our mind. No knowledge is bad.

If I live in damnation, so be it. I'll be happy for the rest of time knowing that it is not God, but I who defined my life. What a ridiculous God when all of the interesting people are damned. And that's a fact. Janis Joplin? Damned. Oscar Wilde? Damned. Most of our Presidents are likely damned. The entire team behind the Manhattan project? Oh boy are they fucked. I find it mildly insulting to say that I need God for guidance and purpose. That only God could ever be the final goal in life. What an absurd parent to expect His children to return home.

Thursday, December 04, 2008

Oh, Men. What Will We Do With You?

This game doesn't euphemize at all. You don't even have to know what it's about and you know that it's meant for men. Big, hulking, bald men with big guns and big "guns," and women in battle bikinis with big guns and big "guns." I guess, kudos to them for knowing their market.